Renaming ADHD: Sonofabi#!@F*%K@%SHOLE Disorder

Glen Hogard, an ADHD coach, posted the following on FaceBook:

[...] I do know I support Chuck Parker’s (and Barkley’s) new suggestion for a name for ADHD. EFD or “Executive Function Disorder”. Sure, I’d prefer difference, but if we want those accomodations [sic] we’d better stick with disorder; which it is in the hostile linear environments in which we must perform.
(Thursday, January 19, 2012 at 8:30am)

To which I replied:

EFD? Maybe. Captures a little bit more of the essence of the problem.
However, I suggest the following as a new name for ADHD:
Sonofabi#!@F*%K@%SHOLE Disorder
I just haven’t figured out how to pronounce it.


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  • Gina Pera

    Jeff. haha!

  • Augie Weiss

    Having a bad day?

    • Jeffs ADD Mind

      Actually…I wasn’t…and I’m not still having a bad day.

  • Paul Alpert

    Jeff, your new name is worthy of a spot in Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary etc. and in the Diagnostic Manual for Psych Disorders (or whatever it’s called)!

    • Jeffs ADD Mind

      Yes. It SHOULD be in the dictionary and/or DSM. At least one can tell from my proposed name what the disorder is really about. ;)

  • Anonymous

    Jeff, I don’t know if we’ll ever be satisfied with any of the ever-changing labels or refinements of labels some keep adding to the list (minimul brain disorder ?!#*- who are these people?)  However, those of us on the inside actually experiencing this brain difference, which most of us would not change given the opportunity unless on the very severe end of ”symptoms”, know that just as in deafness, blindness, genius or cosmic consciousness, only those having that experience can truly understand what it is like….and that tailored by the individual perceptions of the brain experiencing it. 

    That is why so many who do not have this brain type (and we’re all different) never truly ”get it” and that leads to negative perceptions like:  make wrong, just try harder, you must not care if, why can’t you, you always, you never and worse.  

    Thanks for adding your humor to the equation since that is one of the most healing responses and reactions to the times when that brain difference leads us to some uncomfortable interaction with those linears out there we love and who love us.

    • Jeffs ADD Mind

      If you surveyed ADHDers and told them that they could get a new ADHD-free brain, I bet there would be a fairly strong correlation between age and willingness to go through a procedure to get an ADHD-free brain. While there may certainly be some outliers, for the most part, there would be a strong correlation between age and willingness to the go through the procedure with a mitigating factor being one’s perception of one’s success (or lack thereof) in life. (The older one gets and the more one attributes their positive life outcomes to ADHD, the more likely they would NOT go through with the procedure with, of course, the reverse likely being true.)

      Bottom line, I’ve been banging my head against the wall — figuratively — for five decades. If I could go back in time and get an ADHD-free brain based on what I know now, well, it would be tempting.

      Of course there’s no right answer to this and the whole issue is enveloped in moral, philosophical and ontological issues. In other words, if you don’t believe in god and/or reincarnation, then this is all a moot point.

  • Lisa

    OMG – thank you, Jeff.  I needed a good laugh… 

    My household is laden with Sonofabi#!@F*%K@%SHOLE Disorder.  I thought I had it but seeing it in my husband (through chronic alcohol abuse et al.) and now in my son (who is devoid of motivation yet allegedly has an IQ in the top 0.5%), I’m not so sure.  Of course, I do realise Sonofabi#!@F*%K@%SHOLE Disorder comes in varying degrees with different ‘goodie bags’ of symptoms in different sufferers…

    To explain: I’m considering leaving my husband and have recently pulled my 12yo son out of school through sheer desperation, AND fallen out with my entire family.  (The in-laws are in such turmoil that they wouldn’t recall ‘fallings-out’, so no such problems on that front.) 

    Anyway, life is spiralling out of control. I’m wondering now if perhaps I might resort to saving myself if I can’t save the rest.  Mind you, this situation is exactly what I’ve worked hard to avoid for the past 20yrs. I am a planner whose plans have totally come apart.  I’m an ADDer who lacks impulsivity (except for the odd conversational hiccup) although my hyperactive brother diagnosed me with “analysis paralysis disorder” which fits me much better than ADD.  

    Few medicos believe an ADHD diagnosis where I’m concerned.  In fact, the first psychiatrist burst out laughing.  Then just 2 weeks ago, a (Freudian?) neurologist asked me why I took Dex.  ”Gee,” I said, “Why do you think?”  He then made whopping assumptions and without a qualm said my issue was one of personality, not neurology!  What hope is there for me…?!

    SO,  in better times, I may veer towards causing the crux of all these aforementioned problems EFD, but right now Sonofabi#!@F*%K@%SHOLE Disorder pretty much sums it up for me…
    Thanks again for the great website and some levity,

    • Jeffs ADD Mind

      Welcome to the blog and I’m glad you got a few laughs. We all need a good chuckle every now and then.

      Ah…life spiraling out of control. Isn’t ADHD a *wonderful* gift? Don’t you wish you could re-gift it and give it to your enemies? ;)

      “said my issue was one of personality, not neurology” – And a serial killer is just a plain ‘ol killer who has OCD issues…trying to perform the same murder again and again and again…..

  • Lisa

    Oops, I meant: “I may veer towards CALLING the crux of all these problems EFD…”

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