Comments on: How My Father Died http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm A collection point of mental detritus from an a.d.d. mind Mon, 06 Oct 2008 16:06:32 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.2 By: Jeff http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-353 Jeff Wed, 14 May 2008 02:01:13 +0000 http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-353 Sandra, Thank you for sharing that story. I understand, quite well, the depth of your anger. We can hope that, when it is our turn, we get better care than our parents did. At the minimum we will be aware of the danger signs of neglect. And I extend my condolences to you too. I truly understand and feel your pain. Sandra,

Thank you for sharing that story. I understand, quite well, the depth of your anger. We can hope that, when it is our turn, we get better care than our parents did. At the minimum we will be aware of the danger signs of neglect.

And I extend my condolences to you too. I truly understand and feel your pain.

]]> By: sandra http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-352 sandra Tue, 13 May 2008 17:37:19 +0000 http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-352 I realize that mine is an angry entry, and I am angry. I also wish to extend my condolences for your loss, Jeff. It's a sad, sad end for your father, as for mine. I hope your family sues. I realize that mine is an angry entry, and I am angry. I also wish to extend my condolences for your loss, Jeff. It’s a sad, sad end for your father, as for mine. I hope your family sues.

]]> By: sandra http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-351 sandra Tue, 13 May 2008 12:42:14 +0000 http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-351 Jeff: My father died in a nursing home on May 1. He died alone. He was 83 years old. Here's a man who came from Italy, raised a family, served in the U.S. military, paid his taxes, and never took advantage of a soul. And he died alone. He went to a nursing home in Jan. 08, and then I transferred him to a better one in New Jersey--far from the troubles of Philadelphia and its environs. Though he had a cardiac problem, it took the nursing homes only 4 months to make sure we wouldn't have to deal with it again. How many times did he fall in those places?? I got call after call. Don't they watch them a little bit? In the first nursing home, I mainly found the staff watching "American Idol" at night, or laughing and joking at the nurses station, or ordering food. They NEVER interacted with the patients in the compassionate, professional way that Mr. Schafer (above) claims they do. NEVER. I have been to my father's homes 3 to 4 times a week since Jan--never less than 3 times a week. I was so mistrustful. The second nursing home wasn't as bad. Still he died there--and quickly. In part, it was his time. In part, these places are hell holes. And incidentally, I don't give a blow about people on medicaid. My father WASN'T on medicaid, and still got mediocre care, at best. For him, I can't see what the nursing homes were doing that was worth $8,000 a month. The care was basically custodial. As for the people who can make more at Tacobell, that's where they should work. Most are not going to be doing anything else in life anyway--not from what I've seen. The self-absorption, rudeness, loudness and other questionable behaviors (at least at the city nursing home and occasionallly in the other) were not exactly going to move these people into nice desk jobs. Maybe if people disciplined themselves to do right where they are, they could move up a little. Clearly, Mr. Schafer hasn't had a dutiful parent die in a nursing home like a piece of refuse. His detached response about public policy is the one you usually get when people have not been in the trenches. I could go on and on about this issue. If I hadn't been the sole caregiver, if I wasn't also caring for a more functional mother who suffers from Alzheimer's Disease, believe me, my father would never have lived his last days under the "compassionate, professional" care provided in nursing homes. I hope I died at the hand of a terrorist rather than in one of those places. Thanks. Jeff: My father died in a nursing home on May 1. He died alone. He was 83 years old. Here’s a man who came from Italy, raised a family, served in the U.S. military, paid his taxes, and never took advantage of a soul. And he died alone. He went to a nursing home in Jan. 08, and then I transferred him to a better one in New Jersey–far from the troubles of Philadelphia and its environs. Though he had a cardiac problem, it took the nursing homes only 4 months to make sure we wouldn’t have to deal with it again. How many times did he fall in those places?? I got call after call. Don’t they watch them a little bit? In the first nursing home, I mainly found the staff watching “American Idol” at night, or laughing and joking at the nurses station, or ordering food. They NEVER interacted with the patients in the compassionate, professional way that Mr. Schafer (above) claims they do. NEVER. I have been to my father’s homes 3 to 4 times a week since Jan–never less than 3 times a week. I was so mistrustful. The second nursing home wasn’t as bad. Still he died there–and quickly. In part, it was his time. In part, these places are hell holes. And incidentally, I don’t give a blow about people on medicaid. My father WASN’T on medicaid, and still got mediocre care, at best. For him, I can’t see what the nursing homes were doing that was worth $8,000 a month. The care was basically custodial. As for the people who can make more at Tacobell, that’s where they should work. Most are not going to be doing anything else in life anyway–not from what I’ve seen. The self-absorption, rudeness, loudness and other questionable behaviors (at least at the city nursing home and occasionallly in the other) were not exactly going to move these people into nice desk jobs. Maybe if people disciplined themselves to do right where they are, they could move up a little. Clearly, Mr. Schafer hasn’t had a dutiful parent die in a nursing home like a piece of refuse. His detached response about public policy is the one you usually get when people have not been in the trenches. I could go on and on about this issue. If I hadn’t been the sole caregiver, if I wasn’t also caring for a more functional mother who suffers from Alzheimer’s Disease, believe me, my father would never have lived his last days under the “compassionate, professional” care provided in nursing homes. I hope I died at the hand of a terrorist rather than in one of those places. Thanks.

]]> By: Jeff http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-326 Jeff Tue, 11 Mar 2008 23:23:48 +0000 http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-326 And to think we have the "best" health care system in the world...or so we are told. I have more horror stories. My father's youngest brother went in for an operation for kidney cancer. The doctors opened him up and accidentally dropped the cancerous cells into his body cavity. They went back in and nicked his colon. He never really recovered from that one. And to think we have the “best” health care system in the world…or so we are told. I have more horror stories. My father’s youngest brother went in for an operation for kidney cancer. The doctors opened him up and accidentally dropped the cancerous cells into his body cavity. They went back in and nicked his colon. He never really recovered from that one.

]]> By: bloggingawayadhd http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-325 bloggingawayadhd Tue, 11 Mar 2008 08:43:09 +0000 http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-325 Wow, this is so scary. The problems in the news with MRSA infections, and with nurses using dirty syringes in hospitals, and with how bad the veterans' health care system is, have made me really lose faith in our country's ability to properly provide and regulate health care. Of course it's your Mom's decision, but I think people in this situation should sue, because that's the only way that the institutions will take financial hits and bad publicity and maybe clean up their acts. I'm so sorry to hear you had to go through this.... Wow, this is so scary. The problems in the news with MRSA infections, and with nurses using dirty syringes in hospitals, and with how bad the veterans’ health care system is, have made me really lose faith in our country’s ability to properly provide and regulate health care.

Of course it’s your Mom’s decision, but I think people in this situation should sue, because that’s the only way that the institutions will take financial hits and bad publicity and maybe clean up their acts.

I’m so sorry to hear you had to go through this….

]]> By: Jeff http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-323 Jeff Mon, 10 Mar 2008 09:41:02 +0000 http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-323 First, I should state that this post was meant as a warning to others who's parents may not yet be at the "nursing home" stage. Second, it would seem to me that if long-term care is part of the profit-driven world, you would want to pay your labor - care-givers - as little as possible in order to maximize profit. Interestingly we can probably agree that health care (and I include long-term care) is a "good" that all should have access to but how to deliver that good...ay, there's the rub. First, I should state that this post was meant as a warning to others who’s parents may not yet be at the “nursing home” stage.

Second, it would seem to me that if long-term care is part of the profit-driven world, you would want to pay your labor - care-givers - as little as possible in order to maximize profit.

Interestingly we can probably agree that health care (and I include long-term care) is a “good” that all should have access to but how to deliver that good…ay, there’s the rub.

]]> By: schaferltc http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-322 schaferltc Mon, 10 Mar 2008 04:35:36 +0000 http://jeffsaddmind.com/how-my-father-died-270.htm#comment-322 Even if you plant armed guards in every nursing home in the country, you will not solve the quality problem as long as nurses aides can make more money working with fresh vegetables and soda pop at a Taco Bell than they can make working in blood and feces at a nursing home. Get real! The truth is that the nursing home industry provides an extraordinarily high level of compassionate, professional care for a huge number of mostly Medicaid residents in spite of the welfare program's grossly inadequate levels of reimbursement. If nursing homes sometimes fall below that standard, the responsibility--indeed the guilt--lies principally with public policy. However well-intentioned that policy may have been, it created the quality problem by crowding out private financing of long-term care and trapping most people in institutional care inadequately financed by Medicaid. Even if you plant armed guards in every nursing home in the country, you will not solve the quality problem as long as nurses aides can make more money working with fresh vegetables and soda pop at a Taco Bell than they can make working in blood and feces at a nursing home. Get real!

The truth is that the nursing home industry provides an extraordinarily high level of compassionate, professional care for a huge number of mostly Medicaid residents in spite of the welfare program’s grossly inadequate levels of reimbursement. If nursing homes sometimes fall below that standard, the responsibility–indeed the guilt–lies principally with public policy. However well-intentioned that policy may have been, it created the quality problem by crowding out private financing of long-term care and trapping most people in institutional care inadequately financed by Medicaid.

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