Adult A.D.D. & Sex – Enormous Interest…No Discussion

I think it does carry some feeling of shame – who wants to admit that there is something wrong with their sexual relationship(s). The one intimate bonding, that should be unique, special, and one of a kind is confusing and disappointing to a non-ADD’er, perhaps debilitating and hard on self esteem for the ADD’er…there are so many ways to describe it. There is no map, there is no guidebook, it’s like touring a foreign country with no clue what the language is. And the inconsistency of behaviours that ADD can present so much conflicting information to a neurotypical(non-ADD) person that mantaining an intimate relationship with an ADD’er can feel impossible and defeating.
Communication is the best possible tool but again is something hard to maintain and achieve.
People don’t feel able to admit that this is a major issue to them, for whatever reasons, but it is definitely an issue for alot of people that needs brought into the light.

Crimson,

To the same degree that this is a subject that sorely needs to be discussed it is also painful to discuss in public. However, the only extensive discussion I know of can be found here: http://addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=44904 (This thread is a bit dated but still relevant.) If you look through the ADDForums you’ll find other threads of discussion on the topic.

I can understand the hesitation to post comments about adult ADD & Sex. I also understand the high amount of traffic/interest in comments on the subject.I’m here, obviously,so I will comment.>Every drug I am prescribed has warnings of side effects(long list of drugs for Me)which all include “Possible (in some patients)of impotence,depression…etc. I,m lucky to not have these bad side effects?…or is it(I know this is overused)>”All in the mind”. For Me,I am not sure if ADD has caused My “I’m in the mood for it” or just natural way I have always been, since I can remember. But I can’t complain(who would?)about it.

I know I/We are not normal in definition,but I understand the frustration and effects of stress of having a disease. I’m on a unpredictable journey,with no definite answers…just what I tell about My thoughts/comments at this time.No shame today…but in an hour/day..I may think;”Man, what a dumb comment I made!”

Thank You All for being here!!….Scotty.

However…what’s great about A.D.D. is that two hours after you make a dumb comment…you’ve completed forgotten about it because you made another dumb comment. Hmmmm…maybe this isn’t great after all.

On a more serious note, an issue for A.D.D.ers (especially when they are undiagnosed A.D.D.ers) is to make a dumb comment that lingers in their head for years. They can hear themselves making that comment years later and they continue to beat themselves up for having made that comment. Kind of reminds me of Bill Murray in “Groundhog Day.”

Jeff, You’re right about that. Thanks for reminding Me!LOL…Great analogy>Groundhog Day…One of My fav. movies.

Of course, most people — AD/HD or not — would rather do it than talk about it.

Betsy,

This is certainly a case where actions speak louder than words!

Late to the party here, but just a thought: Maybe some visitors were simply expecting to satisfy more prurient interests?

Seriously, it is a big topic. The original draft of my book included 30 pages on it but was cut to 5. A booklet is in the works.

An illustrated booklet…I hope.

For the prurient among us.

An illustration of an ADD’er in bed(with the covers pulled up,not exposing),all alone..a bubble overhead w/words written..”What/who did I forget?”

Scott.

I had to look that word up(I’m admitting, I don’t everthing)and found something I think would be a something to strive for> An Amorous way of showing my desire, rather than Prurient interest in a relationship.

Capt. Obvious strikes again!

Scott.

You are right,but some times words speak louder than actions.