I discovered I was A.D.D. at about age 46. Not the best of times to find that out…certainly not after 46 years of having bad habits solidify. The discovery came when I read Dr. Hallowell’s Driven To Distraction. There’s a section with a lengthy set of statements that you answer “yes/no” depending on whether they describe you or not. Well…I marked “yes” so many times that I thought I earned a prize! (Alas…no prize. ). From there started my journey. While the book read very much like a biography of my life, there was still the need to understand the full depth of the problem, to understand how to recognize the problem while it was occurring, and to understand how to modify the resulting behavior. That’s the quest that I am still on. Wellbutrin has helped wonderfully with that…Ritalin made me climb the walls. I began to realize that there were others (like my kids, my father, one of my uncles, a cousin) that have A.D.D. Interestingly I realized that my old business partner has A.D.D. And that’s probably been the most important discovery because we have become “mentors” for each other since we understand each other quite well. This blog is an attempt to describe what it is like to live with A.D.D. I had tried to create such a blog about 2 years ago. I wrote a few articles and then put it aside. (Typical A.D.D. behavior.) I will work my hardest to assure that this blog keeps going because, if it keeps going it means that I have managed my A.D.D. and channeled it to something productive.
To contact me send an email to info at jeffsaddmind dot com.
Everything on this site, except for comments not written by me, belongs to me. You can freely quote small quantities of material for posting on another site though you must provide a link back to the original post. If you would like to use anything longer than a small quantity, such as an entire posting, requires that you write to me for permission. However, if it enhances my visibility then you are sure to get a ‘yes’ from me.
To contact me send an email to info at jeffsaddmind dot com.
[This copyright notice added on January 2, 2009]
[The following was added on August 24, 2007]
My “academic” side has been concerned about changes that I’ve made to my postings. As much as possible I’ve tried to point out when changes were made. Usually, if a change is made more than 24 hours after something was originally posted, I make a note – in the posting itself – when it was edited. Any modification made within a few hours of the posting I consider to be part of the ongoing editing process (there are times when no matter how often you read something…once you see it posted some error jumps out at you). However I always wondered if there was some sort of ethical rule to follow. A bit of googling turned up this article – Weblog Ethics. In it is this rule: “4. Write each entry as if it could not be changed; add to, but do not rewrite or delete, any entry.” Unknowingly I have come close to fulfilling the letter if not the spirit of this rule. While I admit – as noted above – that I have made some changes, those are not changes of substance but, instead, are changes that clarify the original intent. And when you see something that notes a posting has been edited or material added, that’s my way of letting you know that the changes occurred some time after the original posting and that the material added (or edited) represents a rethinking of the original posting. [The following was added on September 1, 2007]
[following added on Nov. 5, 2010]
Sponsored Content and Advertising
I have been contacted numerous times about posting content and/or advertising that is provided by a marketing agency. In the majority of cases I’ve turned down their offers (they offer a small payment for posting their content or an advertisement). My belief is that anything that I post or advertise carries my implicit endorsement. Therefore, any post that is sponsored content will have a note at the bottom of the post clearly stating that that is the case. At no time will I post anything that is misleading or blatantly false. However, my research capabilities are, at times, limited so do not hesitate to contact me about anything concerning sponsored content or any of the advertising that appears on this website. You can contact me at info at jeffsaddmind dot com.
[following added on Nov. 7, 2007]
I don’t want to be me.
I am sick and tired of being me, because being me means being A.D.D.
I don’t want everything I do to be an issue.
I am sick and tired of dealing with issues.
I am sick and tired of being A.D.D.
I don’t want to pre-reflect and post-reflect and self-reflect.
I just want to be.
I don’t want to be A.D.D.
I’ll be an idiot who thinks the world is great.
I’ll be a smiling fool who knows nothing of fate.
I’ll be anything as long as I am not A.D.D.
[following added on Feb. 20, 2009]
In the Closet
Nicholas Kristof wrote, a few days after Barack Obama’s election, that “American voters have just picked a president who is an open, out-of-the-closet, practicing intellectual.” I’ve used that phrase to describe myself, well, actually, I’ve told people that I am a closet intellectual.
[following added on Feb. 21, 2009]
An A.D.D.er’s Take On This Blog
As A.D.D.ers we are usually pretty bad at self-observation so it was with some interest and fascination and yes, a bit of pride, to find that I had been included in Mike’s virtual neighborhood. A fellow A.D.D.er, he characterized this blog as follows:
“This is not an “A.D.D. Is a Gift” blog by any means. Jeff thinks having A.D.D. sucks, and writes highly analytic and thoughtful posts about how the condition complicates, colors, and otherwise confounds normal life in ways that usually go unnoticed. It’s not a reassuring read, but it’s a brave one, and I concur on a lot of the things he says about the A.D.D. life we both share.”
[following added on Jan. 23, 2010]
Why A Website Redesign?
Long-time readers of this blog will no doubt be shocked by the radical changes that have been made. The very plain black/gray/white palette of the previous design has given way to splashs of color and images. The standard blog layout where the latest post pushed all of the others down (and often out of sight) has given way to a layout that allows easy access to, not only the latest posts but also posts from the past. This access does not require digging through archives since these older posts are accessible from the home page.
The biggest change is the addition of non-A.D.D. material. Though in the past I would infrequently post an item that was not A.D.D.-related, still, I felt stifled. I have many interests and did not have an outlet for those interests. For a time I maintained multiple websites but that became quite tedious.
There is, of course, a danger in making such enormous changes. I worried about losing long-time readers. The “seriousness” of the previous design has given way to a lighter and, one might say, less serious design which may imply that the content has become lighter. On the contrary, I believe you will find a much greater depth to the website. The entirety of my ADD mind will now be on display and, as I’ve already seen with the cooking-related items, has resonated with some of the regular readers.
I do hope that my readers are not turned off by the new layout and that they find that this new layout makes for a more engaging blog experience. For me this change is liberating. I feel like I am finally free, like I have finally emerged from the A.D.D.-closet.
[following added on May 14, 2010]
A Twitterized Description of Jeff’s ADD Mind
“Like a labyrinthine journey into a fantasy world, the blog reflects the sometimes funny and poignant convolutions of a restless ADHD mind.”
The “Jeff’s ADD Mind” blog was started on June 15, 2007 with this post: Drug-induced normalcy(?)